So I resolved my prior issues with libraries and etc, I also got ahold of espressif’s flasher tools etc.
I have flashed my ESP12-F with “ESP8266-EDF-AT_V2.2” I now have everything wired up on a small board and connected to the arduino mega accordingly. (see pic below, since this pic I have moved to serial 3)
I can now upload to the mega with the correct libraries, the blynk library works correctly but it returns the error in my serial monitor of:
 ___ __ __ / _ )/ /_ _____ / /__ / _ / / // / _ \/ '_/ /____/_/\_, /_//_/_/\_\ /___/ v1.1.0 on Arduino Mega #StandWithUkraine https://bit.ly/swua  Connecting to Merle  ESP is not responding
I am stumped at this point, either I am flashing it incorrectly? Or I am wiring something incorrectly, but that im fairly certain im not as I have checked that up and down.
Any pointers would be vastly appreciated!!!